I am ecstatic to report that my sobriety journey has hit a new milestone with the achievement of my first Twice Lucky! This extends my previous record of a ‘Baker’s Dozen’ set yesterday.
Zero ; Twice Lucky ; M: 124 ; C: 87 ; P/U: 50 ; W : 5 mi
Health R.O.S.
- Weight: 207.6
- BMI: 28.1
- Fat %: 21.4
It feels great to continue to make steady progress one day at a time. My whole journey is moving forward much more organically (e.g. with less effort) and beginning to gain momentum.
An Undeniable Sobriety Shift
There has been an undeniable shift in my perspective on sobriety, my overarching thinking patterns, and my general attitude toward life. I am far more positive, productive, creative, and insightful (at least I’d like to think so). At the same time, I’m far less clingy (thoughts don’t get their hooks in me), obsessive, and personally invested in what other people think of me.
On this last point, I don’t take things anywhere near as personally as I used to. In the event that I have a visceral reaction to some perceived slight, I create space, and RAIN all over it.
I’m getting a profound sense that the world is opening up to me in so many ways. These new openings are at once exciting and unexpected. And when I’m feeling better about life generally, I’m thinking less about drinking and smoking weed.
A positive attitude may not solve all our problems but that is the only option we have if we want to get out of problems
– Subodh Gupta
A Journey Without End
Recently, I have come to realize my sobriety journey has no terminus, no end, no final destination. Everything I’m attempting, accomplishing, or failing forward at is a milemarker.
My body’s weight and composition are transitory as are my current goals associated with these subjects. That’s not to say I’m not going to have goals, it’s just that now I understand that once I reach them, their achievement is simply a pit stop along the way.
Thus, there will be no cause for celebration because having arrived there will be enough. Once I’m there, I will suddenly find myself in a new here. The horizon will have receded further, continuing in earnest to remain just beyond my reach. And I, as Tantalus, will continue to grasp in vain for its fruits.
This is fine by me as it seems to be endemic to the human condition. In other words, when there and then become here and now, I will endeavor to engage in new aspirations to pull me ever forward. I also expect the gravity of my future goals to be heavier (more impactful) as I feel an undoubted acceleration underway. There will come a time when linear growth turns exponential.
This feeling is not an acceleration away from the past, or toward the future. It is an acceleration into the ever present now. It will be nice when, at long last, I arrive presently.
