The past few days have been very busy work wise, family wise, and otherwise. It’s the holidays after all! And for me, the most sober holiday season I’ve had in at least thirty years. Now that I’ve been at this sobriety thing for a few months, I can truly appreciate how challenging it is to stay sober at this time of the year. It’s one event after another, and just about everyone is drinking and/or smoking pot.
Zero+ ; 15’er ; M: 186 ; C: 146 ; P/U: 105 ; W: 5 mi
Busy, Busy, Busy
My ‘day job’ has gotten significantly busier of late. Not only do we have the normal fourth quarter revenue push, but I’ve also been tasked to take on several new high profile projects. As a consequence, my schedule has gotten booked solid, and my journaling is suffering.
The true beauty of this season is that Christmas is a story of hope for the broken.
– Christine Trevino
On top of that, I’ve been trying to get this blog finished so I can launch it in a few weeks (I’ve been writing blogs ahead of publication for the past three months). I’ve squeezed in more reading (I just finished Stolen Focus & Sober On A Drunk Planet) and guitar playing.
All of this combined with family obligations, bi-weekly holiday gatherings, maintaining my morning routine, and spending a lot of time with my middle daughter driving to get her ready for her test in a couple of weeks has been taxing on my free time.
Sober Holidays and Weight Loss
If you are a regular reader of the ReturnOnSobriety blog, you’ve likely noticed that I’ve been skipping the daily weigh in lately. To be clear, I haven’t thrown in the towel on my weight loss goals, rather I’ve being realistic as I focus on maintaining my momentum on other fronts.
I don’t feel it makes sense to beat myself up over my weight given the challenges of:
- Two+ holiday gatherings per week between now and New Years
- Christmas back east with all of my mom’s (and extended family’s) excellent holiday cooking
- A near constant flow of holiday treats
I realize that in tackling my goals, I’ve been eating the elephant all at once instead of one bite at a time. If I’m to create a sober holiday season for myself, I believe it is of vital importance to shift gears slightly and:
- Maintain my weight where it is
- Celebrate a sober Christmas and New Year’s eve
- Maintain my daily meditation, yoga, and exercise routine
- Journal where I can and accept that I may not be able to get to it everyday
Reaching sobriety goals during a busy holiday season is of the utmost importance. Yesterday, I managed to hit my second ever 15’er (Thrice Nickel). This was in spite of attending a holiday party last evening where copious amounts of alcohol were flowing.
Staying Sober At Another Holiday Party
I wasn’t 100% sure I was going to be able to make it through last night’s holiday potluck sober. But I was determined to try. My first tactic was to sit down next to John, the only other person in this group who I know doesn’t drink. I’ve known him for years, and don’t think he’s in recovery, I believe he just doesn’t like to drink. So step one was to make sure I was sitting next to him.
John drank a Pepsi while I sipped on bottle water and La Croix. Around us, wine, beer, and spirits flowed freely. A few folks even got a bit ‘jolly’. But sitting next to John helped keep me on track.
Step two, was to allow myself to eat whatever I wanted to, and that included dessert. I felt that enjoying some dessert was a worthy reward for my good behavior. If I added the extra pressure of facing the scale this morning on top of not drinking, it might have taken the shine off an otherwise fun and pleasant event.
Despite my apprehension leading up to the party, to my surprise I found not drinking last night to be easier than I thought. This was in direct opposition to my experience two nights ago.
Sober Christmas Tree Decorating
The night before last, my girls and I decided to head out to the local Christmas tree lot. We bought a beautifully aromatic Noble Fir. Once we got the tree home and set it up, I pulled out our many boxes of Christmas ornaments and the girls got busy decorating.
Suddenly, I had a nearly overwhelming desire to run out to the supermarket and buy some beer. Adding insult to injury, one of the ornament boxes was that of last years twelve pack. A variety pack of beers brewed in Hawaii.
You see, for me, tree trimming and beer drinking are inextricably linked. This Christmas tradition makes it difficult to keep a sober holiday season. I generally drink a few beers while we decorate the tree. Once we finish up, I run out to my office and pull a few bong hits. Then I come back inside, grab another beer, put on some holiday music, and bask in the warm glow of the Christmas tree while continuing to stoke my buzz.
A New Sobriety Goal
Not smoking weed anymore, certainly helps to keep me on track when I’m fighting off Drinkie’s advances. If I was high, I’m certain I would have run out and bought a twelve pack with some excuse like:
“Christmas tree decorating only happens once a year, so what’s the harm this once?”
Instead, I grabbed myself an Athletic non-alcoholic IPA and found it ‘scratched the itch’ to drink beer while Christmas tree trimming. Before long, I found myself wrapped in a warm blanket, Christmas tree aglow and carols streaming. Soon I drifted off to sleep – sober.
For me personally, having non-alcoholic craft beer on hand is critical to hitting my sobriety goals. If you had asked me six months ago if I could enjoy a non-alcoholic beer in place of a real one, I would have responded by saying something like, “What’s the point? Why do you think I don’t drink decaf coffee?”
Yet, I find myself impressed by how well this tactic works and how effectively it takes the edge off.
My gift to myself this sober holiday season is to finally achieve my long sought Thrice Lucky (21 total sobriety days) and potentially extend it beyond that. I’m even considering making this a sober December to remember in preparation for a Dry January. But first, the Thrice Lucky.
Last of my ‘Daily’ Journal Posts
After chronicling my sobriety journey for the past 125 days, I’ve come to realize that much of what I do and say on a daily basis is becoming repetitive. So, while I continue to journal and use journaling as a source for ideas and inspiration, I’ve decided to move away from the daily format and focus my energies on creating more purpose written content.
My hope is that I can dive more deeply into the issues I face in my sobriety journey in hopes that you may find inspiration in your own. I feel that current daily format limits my ability to do this effectively. I will, however, continue to relay my sobriety goals, weight loss progress, and the like in the new format.
If you’ve read all the daily installments thus far, congratulations! I know it’s a lot and I appreciate your commitment to your own healing and wellbeing. Thanks for visiting ReturnOnSobriety and I hope you’ll come back often and check out all the new stuff I’m working on.
All my best,
Dominic
