I’m 72 days into my sobriety journey, depending on how you count it. Today is 90 days marijuana free and an Octet for drinking. But it’s worth mentioning that I’ve only drank alcohol (beer) twice in the past 46 days. While not perfect, I was previously drinking 5-6 nights a week and neither of the two times I drank did I get drunk. Big improvement on both counts! Currently, my longest sobriety stretch is 14 days. Not a world record, but I’m making progress. To help, I’ve found some simple but powerful sober hobbies that keep my mind occupied and my alcoholic monkey at bay. These hobbies are helping me string together ever longer sobriety stretches. Maybe they can help you do the same.
Music
“Music has healing power. It has the ability to take people out of themselves for a few hours” – Elton John
I’ve played guitar, on and off (mostly off), since high school. I was never very good because I didn’t practice. As a teenager, I saw practicing guitar as a burden, particularly since I could only afford a cheap guitar with bad action (e.g. hard to play and uncomfortable).
During covid, my son had an extra guitar lying around and his teacher was coming to the house to give lessons to he and my daughter in our backyard. I decided then and there take a few lessons. Little did I know that two short years later, I’d be jamming with other musicians! Guitar playing and music generally has become my primary sober hobby.
When I picked it back up in 2020, I was drinking like a fish and smoking like a chimney. In fact, guitar was kind of a canary in the coal mine for my alcohol and marijuana use disorders. Some nights after I was pretty lit, I’d pick up the guitar, all inspired, only to find I couldn’t actually play it. I was too shitfaced. Only I didn’t feel that way until I tried (and failed) playing. The guitar demonstrated how drunk I really was even though I didn’t feel that way. It was an Ah-ha moment. One of many to come.
Today, the guitar is no longer something I play drunk or high. It is an excellent hobby, distraction, and diversion. I use it to keep me from getting drunk or high in the first place. It is an especially powerful distraction during my “weakness window” of 4-8pm. I’ll sit down at 4 or 5pm to play. Before I know it, it’s 7pm and time for dinner. Once I make it to 8pm, the monkey is off my back.
It’s easy to get started playing guitar. And it doesn’t have to be an expensive hobby. I recommend starting with a beginner setup and a good teacher (either in person or online). Guitar and music provide infinite exploration, so you’ll never run out of stuff to learn.
The Hobby of Journaling
You may be thinking, ‘Journaling? That’s a hobby? Well, it is. For me, it’s a hobby and a daily habit. Journaling is the reason you’re reading this blog. It all started after I read The Gap And The Gain. Like guitar, journaling was something I tried on and off over the years. In fact, I have more than a few mostly empty journals I started and abandoned over the course of my life. This time, the habit stuck.
I find journaling to be particularly helpful as I pursue sobriety. Journaling keeps me honest. It holds me accountable. If I drink, I have to report it in the journal. Every day I enter my cannabis free number (today is C: 90) I feel a real sense of accomplishment. I never want to see that go back to C: 0 or 1. Someday the same may be true for alcohol. It seems to be trending that way.
Like me, you may find journaling motivational. When you report your alcohol use (or lack thereof), your weight, your sugar intake, your BMI, your miles walked, etc, you’ll find a great deal of accountability. I admit, at first this can be intimidating. But I promise you, if you stick with it tremendously virtuous cycles will gain momentum. For example, today I weigh 205.2 pounds. In my first journal entry after buying a scale, I was 222.2 pounds. The scale and the journal kept me honest. Now I’m down 17 pounds and two pants sizes (25 pounds in all). Get started today. I prefer journals with lined pages and pilot pens for easy writing and clean lines. Make it a daily habit. I journal in the morning after meditation or in the evening after work.
Crafting Hobbies
The headline image on this page is of four dragonflies my daughter and I crafted from an old outdoor patio table. The bodies are the table legs and the wings are the wood slats from the tabletop.
We paint birdhouses, make holiday ornaments and decorations, create garden accents out of what would normally become trash (I like to call this upcycling), paint pictures, make clothes for dolls, and more.
Crafting is a wonderful sobriety hobby. It engages your creativity, lets you repurpose old stuff, and bond with your children all while occupying yourself with something other than drinking. Best of all is the sense of accomplishment you have when you look at the finished product or receive compliments from friends and family who marvel at your fine work.
I get my best ideas from, where else, Pinterest. If you’re not familiar with this social media platform, it’s a crafting and hobby mecca. There are so many talented people in this community sharing their crafts and ideas. YouTube is also a great place to find cool crafts and projects. Get crafting!
Reading
Reading is a great hobby. Some read for entertainment, others for knowledge, and most, unfortunately, not at all. Look, I get it, it’s hard to find time to read. Afterall, you have all those TikToc videos to scroll through and Instagram posts to like and comment on. Who’s got time for reading?
I’m half kidding. Seriously, I know there’s job, kid, and other responsibilities that chew up your time. But let’s face it, most of us spend crazy amounts of our free time binge watching the latest show, death scrolling social media, playing video games, or otherwise ‘vegging out’. For me, it was doing all of these things while getting high and killing a 12 pack of IPA. And what do I have to show for it?
It’s amazing how much time suddenly freed up when I cut my drinking and pot smoking from almost every day to hardly ever (alcohol) and never (pot). That’s the point of this post. You need to fill your former drinking time with something else, preferably productive and confidence building. Reading is wonderful a wonderfully productive use of time.
I choose to alternate between fiction and nonfiction. I like to review and share many of those books in this blog through quotes and reviews. I’ve learned so much in the last few months and grow more knowledgeable everyday day. Best of all, I can apply that knowledge and wisdom to my health, mindfulness, and worldview.
Exercise
I think regular exercise is one of the most important, if not the most impactful, ‘hobby’ on this list. I try to walk/hike with my dog 4-6 miles a day. Some days I do 10,000 – 13,000 steps. I follow up my morning meditation with a 20 minute yoga routine that includes pushups, situps, dumbbells and resistance bands.
I approach sobriety with the mentality I approached sports with. You’re going to put in the time. You’ve got to suit up, show up, and keep your eyes on the win.
– Molly Bloom, Author and Former Competitive Skier
My daily hike allows me to clear my mind, prep for my day, and reflect on my morning meditation. I also have a mantra I repeat several times as I begin. I incorporated this mantra into my daily routine after reading The Four Agreements. Hell, if the four agreements are good enough for Tom Brady, they’re good enough for me! Here they are:
I will be impeccable with my word, take nothing personally, make no assumptions, and will work to do my best.
I particularly like to use the last one (do your best) on days I may be feeling a bit tired or lazy. Of course the best thing about exercise, other than it’s obvious health benefits, is that it releases the feel good chemicals dopamine and serotonin.
From Healthfully:
Addictions are thought to be due, in part, to the release of dopamine in the nucleus accumbens — the “reward” center of the brain. Exercise can boost the levels of dopamine in the brain in these same addictive cycles. We all know people who are “addicted” to exercise. In this way, exercise can create new, positive, addiction pathways that could counter negative addictive behaviors.
We’ve all heard of “runner’s high”. What do you think causes that? Dopamine!
Gardening
There’s nothing like getting your hands dirty. Sure gardening can seem like a lot of work, but it’s very rewarding. You can create beautiful landscapes, planters, and interior spaces. Even a small patio or balcony garden can provide you with a quiet retreat from your busy world.
One of the most delightful things about a garden is the anticipation it provides.
– W.E. Johns
All you need to get started is a few plants you like, some pots, and a bag of soil or compost. That’s it! As I mentioned, you don’t even need much space to create something beautiful. I find the beauty of nature to be incredibly soothing. Especially after a stressful day. Rather than grab a drink or bong hit I now prefer a cup of tea and a book in my garden. Best part is that this form of relaxation is hangover free!
What hobbies do you like?
I could pontificate about my hobbies, pastimes, and distractions all day long. But if you don’t click with any of them, they won’t do you any good. So here’s number 7: What hobbies attract you?
There are literally thousands of hobbies to choose from. For example, maybe you like fishing, photography, blogging (my newest hobby), animal training, hang gliding, scuba diving, hunting, biking, board games, puzzles, stamp or coin collecting, antiquing, restoring cars, motorcycle touring, volunteering, etc.
For many years, two of my primary hobbies were drinking beer and smoking weed. If this is true for you, you might consider exploring some new options. There are more hobbies than any of us could ever hope to do in our lifetimes. Good luck and happy hobbying!
