While Monkey Mind may still be giving me a run for my money, my old pal Drinkie has continued his slide into silence.
Enter meditation & RAIN. I started daily meditation practice exactly 157 days ago (as of the publication of this blog). And it’s been quite a journey. At day 35, I completely stopped smoking pot after being a near daily smoker for over two decades. By day 90 I had gone from drinking 5 nights a week to twice a month, and drinking half as much in a sitting (from 7-10 beers to 2-4). By day 140, I had lost 26 pounds.
I find that the more I let go of alcohol and marijuana addiction, the greater the gravity I feel pulling me forward. I feel less anchored in the past or badgered by The Judge.
I am resolved that there will be no drinking until after Thanksgiving, preferably not until after achieving my first Thrice Lucky and weighing less than 200 pounds. That’s the goal anyway. It’s the redemption I need right now.
3 Incredible Ways Journaling Recast My Relationship with Alcohol
What I soon found was that having to actually write things down brought with it a whole new level of accountability. If I had previously written that I wanted achieve a “Twice Lucky”, and I had thoughts of buying some beer along the way, I suddenly had second thoughts. I didn’t want to face my journal having written one thing and gone and done another. It exposed my habit of lying to myself about my use disorder in technicolor!
And there it is…
“There is neither heaven nor earth,
Only snow,
Falling incessantly”
-Hashin