Sometimes to get ahead, you have to leave stuff behind.
– Mr. Tinicky
You never know what you’ll stumble across on YouTube. Mr. Tinicky Takes a Trip is such a thing. What starts off as a children’s story ends with a whopper of a life lesson we all need to hear. Spoiler alert! It’s the quote above, but I promise you, getting there in this rather short video is worth taking the trip along with Mr. Tinicky and his flag tailed cat.
My daughter found this video a couple weeks ago and ran into my office because she wanted to watch it with me. Being in the middle of a busy work day, I asked her if we could watch it later. She insisted, and here we are. Now I’m writing a blog about it. Go figure.
The story is a simple one. Mr. Tinicky gets bored one day and he and his cat, Chairman Meow (weird name, but let’s go with it) decide they need to get out and see the world. That’s when things get interesting.
Since he’s never gone anywhere before, Mr. Tinicky can’t decide what to pack. So, he ends up packing everything, including his house. What happens next? You’ll have to discover that yourself, but as in most stories with a twist, our hero is confronted with a decision. Of course that fateful decision determines the outcome of the story.
That “thing” that happens is so devastating, Mr. Tinicky has to make some sacrifices. Suddenly it’s become patently obvious that he can’t take everything he owns with him. It’s simply too much stuff and he’s forced to make some choices about what to take and what to leave behind.
Soon, Mr. Tinicky packs only his useful belongings, the stuff he really needs for his trip. Nothing more, nothing less. And, sacrifices made, he and his cat are off to see the world and beyond!
Mr. Tinicky & Emotional Baggage
Now, if that’s all, if that’s the whole story, why would I bother to write a blog about it?
Here’s the thing, sometimes the biggest life lessons come from silly children’s stories. Think about Oh, The Places You’ll Go and Where The Wild Things Are. These are classics in that regard. And while I’m not setting Mr. Tinicky up on a pedestal with either of these works of genius, I’m simply relating that big things can come in small packages. The message of Mr. Tinicky Takes A Trip resonates with me in a way most children’s stories do not and convinces me the author has confronted their own struggles.
The focus of this blog is my struggle with marijuana and alcohol. There are many choices, sacrifices, and life lessons you are faced with when you make the decision to reconcile your relationship with these vices (or any vices or destructive habits for that matter). And none of these choices is easy, most especially in the beginning.
So there I am half watching this video with my daughter, half looking at my email, when the anonymous author says, “The lesson of this story, please keep it in mind: sometimes to get ahead, you have to leave stuff behind.” Suddenly, I’m like, “What did he say?”
“Daddy, he couldn’t take everything. It was too heavy.”
“Yeah, I know, but…” I rewound the video, watched it again, and then the message sank in. That’s precisely what I was/am trying to do. That’s what so many of us are trying to do. We are stuck. Bogged down by our own baggage, all that crap we’ve accumulated and carry with us all our lives. The anger, the jealousy, the perceived failures, lost loves, youth, opportunities. All that baggage! Is that what compels me to drink and smoke pot? Is this baggage why I’m afraid to take risks? How else is this baggage weighing me down and holding me back? More importantly, how do I rid myself of it?
The Lesson of Non-Attachment
This is the whole big idea in Buddhism of non-attachment, of not letting things, ideas, or emotions get their hooks in you. That there comes a time in most peoples’ lives when you can’t move ahead without making some serious life choices. Without giving some stuff up. For me, it’s overuse, misuse, of alcohol and weed and all of the negative consequences thereof.
Since I made the choice to confront these vices of mine four or so months ago, life has changed for the better. And I feel I’m beginning to move ahead. I’m move productive at work, my relationship with my wife and children has improved, I’ve become more social, found new hobbies, and started this blog! If I hadn’t given up the baggage of my use disorder, I’d not only still be mired in it, but progressively getting worse with the passage of time.
Non-attachment and more specifically the R.A.I.N. principle have been instrumental in my ‘leaving stuff behind’. I’m leaving behind: the negative voice in my head, my marijuana addiction (gone!), sleepless nights, hangovers, nagging and embarrassing memories, wasted time, envy, jealously, needless want and desire, and a whole host of other negatives energies and emotional states.
No, Mr. Tinicky didn’t send me on this journey. But, this story caused me to have a ‘non-attachment’ a-ha moment thanks to my daughter’s insistence I watch it with her. So, I encourage you to watch alone, with your kids, or whomever. It’s 4 minutes well spent.