Sobriety Pays! Portfolio Full Year Update
I’m not only not losing this money anymore, but my vice money is actually paying me!
I’m not only not losing this money anymore, but my vice money is actually paying me!
I’ve been questioning the increasingly slippery slope of my use disorder and considering a path toward sobriety for years now.
This led my to a consideration of card games as a proxy for predetermination. If we consider that the act of shuffling the cards randomizes their order and therefore determines how those cards are dealt and/or later drawn, there is little doubt that shuffling ultimately influences the outcome of the game.
SOBER Meditation helps us to create space between external stimuli and our own internal reaction to said stimuli. It’s in this space we gain perspective and can therefore make better choices.
We live in a world of expectation. We have expectations of others and they of us. Why wouldn’t we expect to wake up tomorrow morning, just as we have each and every morning up until now. And of course, we expect our children will listen to us, our fast food will be hot, and our lattes will be made to perfection.
While I am more confident about my sobriety than I’ve ever been, having prepared for this moment, there is a little piece of me that fears the challenge of the day ahead.
As I’ve written many times before, I haven’t given pot up, but rather offered it up or, more plainly, let it go. Strangely, pot seems to have reciprocated by letting me go in return. Everytime I reflect on this mutual letting go, how pot ‘quit me’, I realize how strange it may sound. But that’s what happened. It feels like a amicable breakup devoid of any emotional attachment for lack of a better analogy.
“There is neither heaven nor earth,
Only snow,
Falling incessantly”
-Hashin
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