In his book Ego Is The Enemy, Ryan Holiday delves into why and how ego can be both our greatest asset and biggest liability. As an asset, ego drives us to succeed in a competitive world. Alternatively, it can at the same time become the undercurrent that drags us down and becomes our eventual undoing.
But only in recasting my 99.4% sobriety near miss in terms of blowing the big game have I begun to appreciate the gravity of this crucial lesson
Over the past few years, I would reflect on my lost creativity. I often wondered where the hell it disappeared to. When I think of the times I was happiest, truly in my happy place, it was when I was creating. I falsely believed that alcohol and marijuana would somehow unleash my creativity. Sadly, this false belief drove much of my drinking and drugging over the past twenty years.
As my relationship with alcohol continues to evolve, I feel confident that whatever use disorder I was grappling with 12-18 months ago has eased considerably. But I remain ever vigilant. And I believe one of the best ways to iron my resolve in this matter is to calendar several sober months throughout the year.
When asked why I didn’t want my usual beer, I blamed my adherence to the Plant Paradox diet. This is not entirely untrue, but, you know, explaining the whole gray area drinking, sober curious thing is, well, not something you do with your ‘drinking buddies’.